When marriage fails, the sense of loss can be suffocating. Disappointment, grief, disillusionment flood your life and, in my experience, can leave you drowning in a wave of emotions that are raw and triggered by the one thing many Christian spouses assume will never be an issue for them. At least that was me.
I never dreamed I’d be divorced. I read the stats, I knew the dangers, but I naively believed that because I was a Christian and because I valued marriage (and still do!) that I’d never have “that problem.” I may encounter some other issues, but never that. Well, we know what they say about famous last words.
Divorce is a terrible thing that happens slowly and then very quickly. Looking back, mine was in the making for quite some time. That is a painful reality given how much of that time I prayed for my marriage and spent time diligently seeking God’s best.
I’m now four and a half years removed from the moment our family’s life changed forever and I’ve learned more about the process of divorce that I ever dreamed I would. Heartbreakingly, I’ve learned just how common this is – yes, even in the church. And, I’ve experienced the isolation believers can feel when trying to navigate what some see as the “ultimate failure” in the midst of Christian community. This series of posts is a summary of the advice I was given and the counsel I have provided to dear friends in the midst of similar waters. It is not intended to advocate for – or to make easier – divorce. But, it is an acknowledgement that it happens. And when it does, support is key, prayer is crucial, and God doesn’t leave us.
